Day 289. The Store One.

Over the holiday, we were with my in-laws and we were in Stephen's home town which is a very small, very "old school" community. There literally still is a "Main Street" and, excepting the summer months, the town is home only to locals...many of whom have lived there all their lives and who have raised their families and built their life there. It could be easy to stereotype these people but I find that more often than not, their perspective and approach to life can ground one to what's really important. One such lesson we learned again on Christmas eve.

Christmas eve, my sister-in-law, mother-in-law and I decided to walk Main St. to visit a few of the little stores that line the way. Many stores are "cutesy" boutiques that often, will last a few years until they find that their niche or prices doesn't sustain them based on tourist traffic that only exists a few months a year. We happened upon a little store, tiny but rich in its creative wares and warm, but not over pressuring owner. We bought a few things there and commented on how different, yet practical, so many items were. I've thought about that store quite frequently since our visit and I realized just how badly I want them to succeed.

Its the owner of that store I think of, and highlight today. The store is a realization of a dream that now balances the reality of having a business with still having a life. (Open the day-or weekend-after Christmas? NO. Time to be home with family)

How few of us follow an idea through from concept to inception? How many of us have a dream (little or big) and make it happen - even when examples of similar attempts, that are more often than not unsuccessful, litter the path in front of us? How many of us are confined by restrictions due to required money, or obligations or comfort/stres level? Often I wish I could be bold enough, confident enough to think that a tiny little seed of an idea I had is something that I could turn into reality.

When you walk around any business - realize that it started with someone taking some crazy leap of turning an idea into something that they had no guarantee would work.

I literally pray that this store is there when we return in the Spring. And I guarantee that I will make it a habit to go and shop there frequently - not only because i like the product, but because I believe in supporting this owner who is trying to make a dream into a reality.

Day 288. The Really Really Smart One.

Christmas is only a few days away, and, as someone who believes in this holiday in the Christian way, I tend to reflect on it a bit differently. Part of what I always think about is how I really appreciate the way I have learned about the bible. First, my father had a brief stint in seminary in his early life and so he has always studied the bible in an academic way - with the greek, the latin and quite a few other translations at his fingertips. I have no doubt that it was this thought process that helped our family pick the church that we've attended since I was little - the only church I've ever known.

Our church evolved out of a bible study and it still holds that same focus. You should have seen me going to friends' churches as a small child, the rituals of standing, sitting, singing, and a more "life lesson" sermon were things that were new to me. You see, our pastor was elected by the original bible study to be our leader. He is brilliant - he worked with Einstein back in the day - and is literally one of those rocket scientist types. His extreme thirst for knowledge has translated to how he studies the bible and how he challenges us. A sermon is not a 25 minute time period of him talking at us, its him sharing his study and what he has found and inviting discussion and debate. He cites greek, and latin and the differences between this word for "prayer" and that word for "prayer" in the original language. The man can recite the entire King James translation...by heart.

I appreciate our paster, Art, for what he brings to the study of religion. He brings intense critical thinking and also intense balance of faith. His knowledge is flat out astounding. At this time of year, I always reflect on what I have learned as the reason for the season, and have tremendous appreciation for the ways in which I have been taught about religion - not with guilt, or intense focus on ritual for ritual's sake, but for seeking understanding and knowledge and, sometimes, just going forward on faith. Because sometimes, even outside of religion, that's all you've got to get you through.

I don't write this to convince anyone to think any certain way about the holiday of Christmas, but I just want to recognize someone who has truly sought knowledge and had the most incredible capacity for belief, and love, and education and debate - more than pretty much anyone I know.

Day 287. The Verifying One.

We live in America, and that means we each get to have our own opinion. I have always thought that is a good thing, the problem is, that sometimes, our opinions take over...and get stirred up and misconstrued as "truth" or, worse yet, they become weapons in a philosophical war instead of a building block for understanding and communication.

Yesterday, I was reminded how rich and refreshing it is to find someone who will seek out information first before jumping to conclusions. I'm not going into depth about the issue at hand because that is not what this post is about, what this post IS about is Jeff. Jeff is someone I know rather casually - but I have gained a bit of access into his life and I have always appreciated how he lives his life and what he shares about himself and his family. Yesterday, Jeff reached out to me out of the blue, to ask for information on something that he knows I'm familiar with. Its a touchy subject and so, I was particularly pleased to know that someone was seeking out the information about it before jumping to a conclusion. I wrote a rediculously long explanation to him and he received it gracefully.

I haven't really followed up on the issue since - and honestly, whether or not Jeff shares the same opinion as I do doesn't matter. What DOES matter is that Jeff is someone who cares enough to find out as much as he can about something before just running on hearsay or jumping to conclusions. This is one of the values I hold most dear in life.

Jeff could vehemently disagree with me for the rest of our lives (on this issue or any other) and honestly, I would love that because I know enough to know that Jeff is thoughtful in his opinions and positions. To know people like this is to ensure that you will always be able to back up your decisions about what you think and what you do. In my opinion, this is behavior to emulate. Period.

Day 284...Cont'd...

Often times my husband and I get into arguments about "talking about people". He calls it gossip, I try to explain to him that in most cases (yes, I fall prey to gossiping), its how women work to understand people. Tiger Woods has provided food for thought on that one for sure...everyone's talking about him, and I like to believe that the circle I've been talking about this all with haven't been sensationalizing but learning...

Tonight my friend Soren posted a unique and tremendously interesting perspective...please take a moment to read this and think...think.

Arguably, a month ago, Tiger Woods could have been a candidate for my blog. Is he still? Will he ever be again? Discuss...cause I am not sure either.

Day 286. The Sonoma One.

I hang out with a lot of chefs. I am married to an amateur one (who at the last minute turned down his acceptance to CIA but I digress). Perhaps it's because I love food, or perhaps its because I admire this particular brand of creativity...but I am really blessed to hang out with (and eat the creations of!) the chefs I know. This one particular one, DK, is someone who will always be with me, at least in spirit, because when I met him, the very last thing I found out about him was that he was a chef. He was the brother of the best friend of a guy I was dating (got it?) and he was just super cool and super fun. He was just my friend D. He was wild and crazy and awesome.

You can imagine my surprise when we went to the restaurant he was cooking at in San Francisco. I went with a girlfriend of mine, and when we sat down, the server told us that D. would be taking care of the menu. Thus proceeded three hours of true culinary bliss...only magnified that as I ate one of my top 5 all time meals, I was shocked to realize this was all coming from a guy I just knew as a fun friend. There's something supremely powerful and intimate about seeing someone you know socially reveal their true gift and passion. That is what that night was all about.

I've eaten at some of the other restaurants D. has worked at and I've eaten at his very own restaurant (the first one...) in Napa. I've had the chance to follow his career through culinary channels as well. He's won extremely prestigious awards and, well, let me say that if you follow some of the more popular food shows you've seen him on one particular one...twice.

While D. and I don't talk much anymore, I still consider him a friend and he continues to be a beacon to me of what living life fully is all about. He will always personify doing everything fully - living, being with friends, working, following your passion. I don't think I've ever seen D. at less than 100% going. I am keeping some of the identifying details out of this post because I don't want to be accused of riding on a celeb's coattails or anything...but, should your mind go there, the reason I am writing about this incredible man today is because what everyone else knows him for was the last thing I knew about him and the least of the reasons why I value him and what he puts into the world.

Day 285. The Ageless One.

Kay is a friend who lives in Munich who I met through one of those "friend of a friend" scenarios. We've barely had time to really connect and we've probably seen each other a total of a few days over the past few years and a few visits by me to Germany. But, Kay is still awesome and I know this for a fact.

First and formost, the fact that I consider Kay a friend is a testament to how welcoming he is to people and how kind of heart he is. If you saw Kay, this might not be your first impression. He exudes "cool" and lives the life a lot of guys dream of - great girlfriend, great condo, great car, great clothes, hip hangouts - you get the picture. But I feel like I know Kay to be a devoted person - devoted to who he is, to his friends, and to having a great time in life. I was reminded of this through one of those funny little random Facebook exchanges that happened last night through another of our mutual friends. We were joking about the validity of people over 30 being on Facebook (note: Kay and I are over 30, the other person, not so much...love ya, Jim). And somewhere along our pithy, silly little comments Kay said something to the effect that age is just a state of mind. Kay personifies this - talk about someone who enjoys life and wants to take you along for the ride...

Age is a state of mind. Right you are my friend. Right you are. Cheers!

Day 284. The Imperfect One.

Hey did you hear about Tiger Woods?

I know, I know. You're probably rolling your eyes right now. But the story of a random early morning accident followed by stalling the police and then ultimately an admission of an affair is everywhere. There's been a lot of discussion about "right" vs. "wrong" not only in the actual series of events but how the series of events was handled. The discussion has also move to whether we should even care or be made aware of anything other than Tiger's golf career. I've been thinking about that.

So, today, I am picking the unlikely candidate of Charles Barkley. Yep. Who knew? Sir Charles has certainly had his own set of issues. He is far from perfect. Here's the trick, and here's why I like him. He acknowledged both of those things early on. Some of you may be too young to remember his "I Am Not a Rolemodel" commercials for Nike. In my opinion, they didn't get enough air time. The message was clear - Charles (and Nike) knew he was a very good basketball player but that is where emulating him should stop. If you want to know how to live your life, how to interact with people, what morals to have, what to do with your money, do NOT look to Charles.

When you really think about our celebrity focused culture these days, and really think about what we think we have a right to know its crazy. Its also crazy to think about why is someone famous in the first place (i mean, c'mon, "being hot"? Is that really enough of a criteria? You have good genes?)

Anyway, I'm not defending Tiger in all that's gone down, nor am I blaming him. But we are expecting too much from some people for the wrong reasons. I urge you to consider thinking about your heroes as Charles Barkley advised - respect them for their unique talents but don't be lazy and use that as an excuse to think that a person is "perfect". And if you're blessed enough to be "talented" try focusing on only sharing that part of your life and reminding us that is the only area of your life to be studied. (I mean really, what does Tiger Woods have to do with selling Razors, really?)

P.S. I'm getting off my soapbox now

P.P.S. Special thanks to those on Twitter who engaged in debate with me about this. I enjoyed your points and perspective immensely. The way we were talking about this was not a simple thing

Day 283. The Cleaning Ones.

Last night, my husband had the cool privilege to play with his hockey team on the main ice after the Columbus Blue Jackets game. We had about 30 minutes to mill about while we waited for the zamboni to finish its work, the arena to clear of CBJ fans, and our team to change into their gear. This also gave us PLENTY of time to walk a fair distance from our seats in the next to last row of the arena to front row seats at center ice.

What do you notice when you cover pretty much every row in a 20,000 person arena? You notice how sloppy we are when we aren't in our own space. Every possible thing that was sold at a concession stand last night was now on the floor in some form or another: nachos, peanuts (and their shells), soda, beer, ice cream, popcorn, chili, etc. Ewwww.

While we waited for our team to play the cleaning crew began their work. There's no way to automate this. There's no machine to sweep every seat, and cupholder, and part of the floor (all around the seats and in the aisles). Human labor is required to pick up every item and place it in the trash. I never got a proper count, but there were not that many men and women assigned to the task of cleaning every single one of the 20,000 spots for fans - the most I counted were 15 cleaning staff.

This team worked before our game, during our game, and were continuing their work after we were done (and they were not even half way through the arena). This is thankless work. This is important work. Its important for the brand of our hockey team, for health reasons, for longevity of the facility and attractiveness of our city for other events. But noone sees it, noone appreciates it, and in fact, most just add to it.

So, although I was able to only thank 3 or 4 of the cleaning staff personally last night, I want them all to know that their work is valuable and important and noticed, if only by the fact that noone complains about a dirty seat when they sit down in the arena the next time. I also took this lesson as a reminder that its my job to keep the areas that my life impacts as clean as possible. If you wouldn't throw down a half eaten container of popcorn in your house, don't do it at a public facility. If you don't leave peanut shells on your living room floor, or don't plan on cleaning it up yourself, don't make a mess elsewhere. It goes above personal responsibility. It goes to individual respect - the men and women who cleaned up after all of us last night are good, hard working, kind people and they don't need to pick up after me because I'm too lazy to do it.

I appreciate the work that this team did into the wee hours of the morning and I appreciate that they reminded me to not just expect others to take care of my stuff :)

Day 282...Sort of...Breaking the Rules...

I feel like I am always rehashing this point of this blog. I feel like I am beating a dead horse when I so blatantly say that the whole point is to acknowledge those we love, respect, honor while they are here to receive the gift of our appreciation.

And then...well, life takes over. And one gets busy...and one (like myself) starts to search perhaps too much for who to write about next - who to thank next. This person is too famous, this person probably already gets so much praise...and then you remember that no matter what, no matter how "famous", no matter if someone knows you or not...tell them they mean something.

Tonight we lost someone who I have always loved so dearly for who she was and what she represented. Not only in terms of her fight against breast cancer but in terms of having one of the most amazing love stories I have ever known.

Tonight - I am sorry that I never acknowledged this person while she was here...maybe she would have never known that I wrote about her. But I would have known that I tried. Don't ever stop trying to tell those you love, appreciate, respect that you do so...

Now please read >> THIS

Day 281. The Chicken One.

This post will remain anonymous today. But I know someone who has recently taken a new direction in life. I don't know all the details as to why - but I do know that this person made a big difference in every path they have ever followed.

The recent times that had our lives intersect taught me that this person - a woman - is the epitome of women in leadership as I'd hope to see them: smart, passionate, strong, gets stuff done, eloquent, and all while wearing great shoes. During our time "Together" she brought hope, clarity and, at least for me, provided a sense of calm and direction in ever changing landscapes.

I know that she can, and has, made a lot happen in the world. I would argue she has also made a lot happen, even without trying, for women in the workplace.

I know that the only constant is change and so, while I am saddened to see new directions being forged, I am happy to have been aware of this person for even a brief time and I wish her all the best.

Sorry to be so vague - but in the off chance that this "One" does read this she'll know - and that's the point!